Capriccio Bubbly Sangria: A Review

Capriccio Bubbly Sangria has made quite the wave on Twitter recently. People are claiming it to be a "fancier Four Loko," so naturally, I had to try it out. I'm gonna give you a step-by-step, drink-by-drink, review. I'm writing this as the process unfolds, so the finished product is going to be my real, probably tipsy, feelings. 

And I know what you're thinking, "Pat, it's Wednesday, relax." Well, you got me there. I have no further comment.

Buying it was relatively easy. I expected it to be sold out because of the recent uptick in popularity, but I was wrong. The first liquor store I went to had it. It was $11 for a four pack, which seemed kind of pricey, but time will tell. 

The wrapping on the bottle is pretty cheesy, but it definitely draws your eye to it. It smells like a mixture of a really bad hangover and a bunch of different fruits (AKA a cheap wine).

First sip: Wow, this is absolutely terrible. It's like someone gave a five-year-old alcohol and fruit juice and told them to make me a drink. I can already tell that I'm not gonna enjoy this experience until the second bottle, at least. Wait a minute. Maybe it's because of the hype, but I think I actually feel something after one sip. Okay, maybe it's not as bad as I originally painted it to be...

End of bottle #1: I feel like I just had a few vodka drinks. Not exactly sure what these guys put in this drink (I know it's sangria) but I can definitely see why people were freaking out about it, especially if you're a lightweight. It definitely gets better as you have more, which is encouraging. It might be hitting me harder than I thought, even after the big dinner I just ate. Reports to follow.

End of bottle #2: I've officially entered Lil Peep (RIP to the legend) territory, which is scary seeing as though I've only had two drinks. That last sentence required some heavy editing. I can absolutely see why lightweights would be thrown on their ass by this stuff. I can see it being a really dope pregame drink before going to a bar or whatever. It's kind of making me a little tired, though. I peeled the wrapping off of the bottle and I now know why they have it over the whole thing. It looks gross.

INTERMISSION: Okay so first half review is a 8.2/10. It definitely gets the job done. I can see why people would black out super quick with these things. I started at just about 8 p.m. and it's now 8:40. I've been known to have a few beers here and there, so I'm pretty used to being able to handle the buzz. Excited for what the second half holds.

End of bottle #3: The transition between #2 and #3 is pretty hard. I am way more drunk than I thought I’d be. I’m texting random people I haven’t talked to in a while. I haven’t sent any snapchats yet which is encouraging. I haven’t got off of the Peep train yet. These things are definitely legit. Number four is 100% gonna put me to sleep. I think this is a good drink for people who don’t drink that much and want to have a quick and easy night with their friends. I definitely plan on buying it again. I wish I didn’t correct my spelling mistakes. You know what? I’m not gonna on number four. Side note: I have two waters to prepare for this sugary-ass hangover.

End of bottle #4/final review: Okay! So this has been an experience. No spell check ehere. I think this shit is dope. I feel like it’s 4 a.m. However, it is not. I would recommend this weird ass drink to any of my friends. I switched from Peep to Bruce Springsteen and it is great. Just jamming. No big deal. All and all, (that transition sucks ass) I would give this a 9.4/10. The effectiveness is just unmatched by a bottled drink. I started drinking less than two hours ago and I feel like I was at a darty or something. I’m kinda pissed I’m not making spelling erros. Oh, there we go. Better late than never. Capariccio Bubbly Sangria is not for everyone. But, the next time I am in a pinch, it might be for me.

Five munites later I put on Famous by Mason Ramsey. Yodel Kid is the truth and I want no other opinions besides that.