Daily Roundup 7-17-18

Graphic design is my PASSION

Let the records show that my hair day was fantastic, but my day quickly turned sour. My eye thing is still happening and I don't know how to stop the beast growing on my eye/eyelid. Not sure what to do here, but I know one thing, I won't be getting it checked out by anybody anytime soon!

I'm gonna start writing these things the night of the date in the title and posting them the next morning. I don't know why this matters to you, but I'm just trying to clear up any confusion. Also, I'm gonna use that pic at the top for the pic of every one of these. If you have a better idea/pic to use, let me know.

July 17, 2018 Daily Roundup:

--Apparently some dude called the real cops after he got fouled too hard in a pickup basketball game. Talk about never getting let onto the court again. No chance I'd want that dude on my team and I am the worst basketball player you've ever seen in your life. If you're really gonna call the cops on a screen that knocked you down, go play cribbage. No need for weak-minded, flopping, complaining athletes in basketball? Right?

But for real, this dude sucks and I hate him.

--I'm gonna go ahead and chalk this next one up to things I did not know and am sufficiently freaked out about. Apparently Future's face was actually in the background of the DS2 cover the whole time. Check it.

obviously the circles are not his face, dummies

I love that album and I had NO IDEA that his face was staring at me while I bumped it in my car all these years. My respect for Future is on a whole new level after this. Also, if this was like a widely known thing please don't tell me and just let me have this moment.

--Some kid walked 20 miles to get to his job on time. TWENTY MILES. I guess the boss or whatever gave him his own car for the feat. I'm kinda conflicted on this story. I love the tenacity and dedication to making money. This is the real life equivalent of people posting on Instagram that they're "all about the money" and how "money is over everything." This kid took it up five hundred notches and got the recognition he probably deserves.

On the other hand, I totally hate this kid. I have like a 25 minute drive to work and, yanno, sometimes I will be late by a few minutes. I walk about 50 feet total. This kid is walking a billion feet and still gets to work on time. People like this make it hard to be a normal person in society. I guess I'll chalk this up as a loss in my book and move on with life.

--I don't even know where to start with this one. An Iowa guy, named King Kong Choul, got arrested after threatening to eat some kids in his apartment complex. KING. KONG. CHOUL! What a power move from this guy. I assume he wasn't satisfied with having the coolest name in the world and figured he had to take it up another notch to get some recognition. Eating kids is never cool, I want you to know that's my official stance, but this is absolutely hysterical.

Imagine a man whose name is literally King Kong threatening to eat your children. Of course he's doing that. He's King Kong. I would probably be scared shitless, but at the end of the day, I'm definitely gonna laugh about the whole situation. This is something straight out of a Chapelle Show skit and I love it so much (mostly because he didn't really eat any kids.) Picture for reference:

Legend

--Elon Musk is doing Elon Musk things again. After a diver that helped rescue the Thai soccer team said that the Tesla CEO's attempt to use his weird homemade submarine was never practical, Musk called him a pedophile. Not really sure how those two things align at all but this is such a bad move I have no choice but to respect it. Musk just has no basis for this claim and was clearly mad that he didn't get any shine in helping the cave rescue efforts. It's a move as old as time, you don't get to save the day so you try to make it look like the real heroes suck ass. Wait, nope, it's definitely not a classic move, it's just really shitty. Musk is slipping into this deep pit of being a total asshat and I hate watching it happen.

--Trump admitted he misspoke, for the first time in his presidency, when talking about whether or not Russia meddled in our election. The other day, he said he doesn't see any reason why it WOULD be Russia. Today, he says he muffed up and meant to say he doesn't see any reason why it WOULDN'T be Russia. Classic mixup, especially when you're standing two feet away from the guy that was behind the whole meddling thing. This makes Trump look like he got bullied into oblivion and had to wait until he got back to the US to say what his people told him to. Everything is great! No worries about anything over here!

--The MLB All Star Game was yesterday and I didn't watch a second of it because it stinks. Stinks to high heck! Keith Olbermann wrote an article the other day on how to make people interested in this game again and I agreed with it all. Now that the game doesn't decide who has home field advantage in the World Series, I don't care about it at all. (That was a ridiculously stupid way to decide home field advantage but it did make you root for the league your team is in.) It needs to take risks that aren't easily applied to a normal baseball season. Let the players punch each other like its Slugfest 2003. Play a mini tournament with teams picked by captains. Just do something to spice it up a little bit because that should be one of the highlights of the MLB season and not that many baseball fans care about it anymore.

Okay, that's your Daily (when I feel like it) Roundup for July 17th, 2018. Enjoy your hump day.

Buy a damn shirt, I have three of them on sale now. Support the cause!
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